The Philosopher also gives another reason for this honor to parents, in that we cannot make an equal return to our parents for the great benefits they have granted to us; and, therefore, an offended parent has the right to send his son away, but the son has no such right [ Ethics V]. Parents, indeed, give their children three things. The first is that they brought them into being: “Honor your father, and forget not the groanings of your mother; remember that through them you were born” [Sir 7:29-30]. Secondly, they furnished nourishment and the support necessary for life. For a child comes naked into the world, as Job relates (1:24), but he is provided for by his parents. The third is instruction: “We have had fathers of our flesh for instructors” [Hb 12:9]. “Do you have children? Instruct them” [Sir 7:25].
Parents, therefore, should give instruction without delay to their children, because “a young man according to his way, even when he is old will not depart from it” [Prov 22:6]. And again: “It is good for a man when he has borne the yoke from his youth” [Lam 3:27]. Now, the instruction which Tobias gave his son (Tob 4) was this: to fear the Lord and to abstain from sin. This is indeed contrary to those parents who approve of the misdeeds of their children. Children, therefore, receive from their parents birth, nourishment, and instruction.
What children owe parents
Now, because we owe our birth to our parents, we ought to honor them more than any other superiors, because from such we receive only temporal things: “He who fears the Lord honors his parents, and will serve them as his masters that brought him into the world. Honor your father in work and word and all patience, that a blessing may come upon you from him” [Sir 3:10]. And in doing this you shall also honor thyself, because “the glory of a man is from honor of his father, and a father without honor is the disgrace of his son” [Sir 3:13].
Again, since we receive nourishment from our parents in our childhood, we must support them in their old age: “Son, support the old age of your father, and grieve him not in his life. And if his understanding fail, have patience with him; and do not despise him when you are in your strength... Of what an evil fame is he who forsakes his father! And he is cursed of God who angers his mother” [Sir 3:14,15]. For the humiliation of those who act contrary to this, Cassiodorus relates how young storks, when the parents have lost their feathers by approaching old age and are unable to find suitable food, make the parent storks comfortable with their own feathers, and bring back food for their worn-out bodies. Thus, by this affectionate exchange the young ones repay the parents for what they received when they were young” [ Epist. II].
We must obey our parents, for they have instructed us. “Children, obey your parents in all things” [Col 3:20]. This excepts, of course, those things which are contrary to God. St. Jerome says that the only loyalty in such cases is to be cruel [ Ad Heliod ]: “If any man hate not his father and mother... he cannot be My disciple” [Lk 14:26]. This is to say that God is in the truest sense our Father: “Is not He your Father who possessed you, made you and created you?” [Deut 32:6].
Rewards for keeping this commandment
“Honor your father and your mother.” Among all the Commandments, this one only has the additional words: “that you may be long-lived upon the land.” The reason for this is lest it be thought that there is no reward for those who honor their parents, seeing that it is a natural obligation. Hence it must be known that five most desirable rewards are promised those who honor their parents.
Grace and Glory.—The first reward is grace for the present life, and glory in the life to come, which surely are greatly to be desired: “Honor your father... that a blessing may come upon you from God, and His blessing may remain in the latter end” [Sir 3:9-10]. The very opposite comes upon those who dishonor their parents; indeed, they are cursed in the law by God [Deut 27:16]. It is also written: “He who is unjust in that which is little, is unjust also in what is greater” [Lk 16:10]. But this our natural life is as nothing compared with the life of grace. And so, therefore, if you do not acknowledge the blessing of the natural life which you owe to your parents, then you are unworthy of the life of grace, which is greater, and all the more so for the life of glory, which is the greatest of all blessings.
A Long Life.—The second reward is a long life: “That you may be long-lived upon the land.” For “he who honors his father shall enjoy a long life” [Sir 3:7]. Now, that is a long life which is a full life, and it is not observed in time but in activity, as the Philosopher observes. Life, however, is full inasmuch as it is a life of virtue; so a man who is virtuous and holy enjoys a long life even if in body he dies young: “Being perfect in a short space, he fulfilled a long time; for his soul pleased God” [Wis 4:13]. Thus, for example, he is a good merchant who does as much business in one day as another would do in a year. And note well that it sometimes happens that a long life may lead up to a spiritual as well as a bodily death, as was the case with Judas. Therefore, the reward for keeping this Commandment is a long life for the body. But the very opposite, namely, death is the fate of those who dishonor their parents. We receive our life from them; and just as the soldiers owe fealty to the king, and lose their rights in case of any treachery, so also they who dishonor their parents deserve to forfeit their lives: “The eye that mocks his father and despises the labor of his mother in bearing him, let the ravens pick it out, and the young eagles eat it” [Prov 30:17]. Here “the ravens” signify officials of kings and princes, who in turn are the “young eagles.” But if it happens that such are not bodily punished, they nevertheless cannot escape death of the soul. It is not well, therefore, for a father to give too much power to his children: “Do not give to a son or wife, brother or friend, power over you while you live; and do not give your estate to another, lest you repent” [Sir 33:20].
The third reward is to have in turn grateful and pleasing children. For a father naturally treasures his children, but the contrary is not always the case: “He who honors his father shall have joy in his own children” [Sir 3:6]. Again: “With what measure you measure, it shall be measured to you again” [Mt 7:2]. The fourth reward is a praiseworthy reputation: “For the glory of a man is from the honor of his father” [Sir 3:13]. And again: “Of what an evil fame is he who forsakes his father?” [Sir 3:18]. A fifth reward is riches: “The father’s blessing establishes the houses of his children, but the mother’s curse roots up the foundation” [Sir 3:11].
Meanings of “father”
“Honor your father and your mother.” A man is called father not only by reason of generation, but also for other reasons, and to each of these there is due a certain reverence. Thus, the Apostles and the Saints are called fathers because of their doctrine and their exemplification of faith: “For if you have ten thousands instructors in Christ, yet not many fathers. For in Christ Jesus, by the gospel, I have begotten you” [1 Cor 4:15]. And again: “Let us now praise men of renown and our fathers in their generation” [Sir 44:1]. However, let us praise them not in word only, but by imitating them; and we do this if nothing is found in us contrary to what we praise in them.
Our superiors in the Church are also called fathers; and they too are to be respected as the ministers of God: “Remember your prelates,... follow their faith, considering the end of their conversation” [Hb 13:7]. And again: “He who hears you, hears Me; and he who despises you, despises Me” [Lk 10:16]. We honor them by showing them obedience: “Obey your prelates, and be subject to them” [Hb 13:17]. And also by paying them tithes: “Honor the Lord with your substance, and give Him of the first of your fruits” [Prov 3:9].
Rulers and kings are called fathers: “Father, if the prophet had commanded you do some great thing, surely you would have done it” [2 Kg 5:13]. We call them fathers because their whole care is the good of their people. And we honor them by being subject to them: “Let every soul be subject to higher powers” [Rm 13:1]. We should be subject to them not merely through fear, but through love; and not merely because it is reasonable, but because of the dictates of our conscience. Because “there is no power but from God” [Rom 13:7]. And so to all such we must render what we owe them: “Tribute, to whom tribute is due; custom, to whom custom; fear, to whom fear; honor, to whom honor” [Rom 13:41]. And again: “My son, fear the Lord and the king” [Prov 24:21].
Our benefactors also are called fathers: “Be merciful to the fatherless as a father” [Sir 4:10]. He, too, is like a father [who gives his bond]. of whom it is said: “A good man will be surety for his neighbor, but a man who has lost his sense of shame will fail him” [Sir 29:14]. On the other hand, the thankless shall receive a punishment such as is written: “The hope of the unthankful shall melt away as the winter’s ice” [Wis 16:29]. Old men also are called fathers: “Ask your father, and he will declare to you; your elders and they will tell you” [Deut 32:7]. And again: “Rise up before the grey head, and honor the person of the aged man” [Lev 19:32]. “In the company of great men take not upon you to speak; and when the ancients are present, do not speak much” [Sir 32:13]. “Hear in silence, and for your reverence good grace shall come to you” [Sir 32:9]. Now, all these fathers must be honored, because they all resemble to some degree our Father who is in heaven; and of all of them it is said: “He who despises you, despises Me” [Lk 10:16].
ARTICLE 7
THE FIFTH COMMANDMENT
“You Shall Not Kill.”
THE SIN OF KILLING
In the divine law which tells us we must love God and our neighbor, it is commanded that we not only do good but also avoid evil. The greatest evil that can be done to one’s neighbor is to take his life. This is prohibited in the Commandment: “You shall not kill.”
Killing of Animals Is Lawful.—In connection with this Commandment there are three errors. Some have said that it is not permitted to kill even brute animals. But this is false, because it is not a sin to use that which is subordinate to the power of man. It is in the natural order that plants be the nourishment of animals, certain animals nourish others, and all for the nourishment of man: “Even the green herbs have I delivered them all to you” [Gen 9:3]. The Philosopher says that hunting is like a just war [ Politics I]. And St. Paul says: “Whatsoever is sold in the meat market, eat; asking no questions for conscience’ sake” [1 Cor 10:25]. Therefore, the sense of the Commandment is: “You shall not kill men.”
The Execution of Criminals.—Some have held that the killing of man is prohibited altogether. They believe that judges in the civil courts are murderers, who condemn men to death according to the laws. Against this St. Augustine says that God by this Commandment does not take away from Himself the right to kill. Thus, we read: “I will kill and I will make to live” [Deut 32:39]. It is, therefore, lawful for a judge to kill according to a mandate from God, since in this God operates, and every law is a command of God: “By Me kings reign, and lawgivers decree just things” [Prov 8:15]. And again: “For if you do what is evil, fear; for he does not bear the sword in vain; for he is God’s minister” [Rm 13:4]. To Moses also it was said: “Wizards you shall not allow to live” [Ex 22:18]. And thus that which is lawful to God is lawful for His ministers when they act by His mandate. It is evident that God who is the Author of laws, has every right to inflict death on account of sin. For “the wages of sin is death” [Rm 6:23]. Neither does His minister sin in inflicting that punishment. The sense, therefore, of “You shall not kill” is that one shall not kill by one’s own authority.
Suicide is Prohibited.—There are those who held that although this Commandment forbids one to kill another, yet it is lawful to kill oneself. Thus, there are the examples of Samson (Judges, xvi) and Cato and certain virgins who threw themselves into the flames, as St. Augustine relates in The City of God [I, 27]. But he also explains this in the words: “He who kills himself, certainly kills a man” [ ibid. 13]. If it is not lawful to kill except by the authority of God, then it is not lawful to kill oneself except either upon the authority of God or instructed by the Holy Spirit, as was the case of Samson. Therefore, “you shall not kill.”
Other Meanings of “To Kill.”—It ought to be known that to kill a man may happen in several ways. Firstly, by one’s own hand: “Your hands are full of blood” [Is 1:15]. This is not only against charity, which tells us to love our neighbor as ourself: “No murderer has eternal life abiding in himself” [Jn 3:15]. But also it is against nature, for “every beast loves its like” [Sir 13:19]. And so it is said: “He who strikes a man with a will to kill him, shall be put to death” [Ex 21:12]. He who does this is more cruel than the wolf, of which Aristotle says that one wolf will not eat of the flesh of another wolf [ De animal. IV].