Here again is love, for from it proceeds obedience to one another: not according to any worldly or human calculations, but in the "fear," he says, "of God." For those who submit to one another for the sake of God will never fall into temptation nor be separated, having such a firm bond.
Eph. 5:22. Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord,
Not without reason and not in vain does Paul devote great care to marriage, for God too from the beginning was especially concerned with it. For He joined with Adam his sister — no, more than that — his daughter; but what am I saying? His own flesh. Then, as the race multiplied, He also widened the boundaries of marriage, so as not to confine love within the narrow limits of kinship alone. Indeed, our very life is sustained by marriage. Therefore he says: "Wives, submit to your own husbands." For if marriage is distinguished by harmony, then the children will be well brought up, the servants will fulfill their duty, and everything concerning neighbors and friends will go well. Submit as to the Lord. But how then is it written in another place: if anyone does not part from his wife and the wife from her husband, he cannot follow Me (Luke 14:26)? For if one must submit as to the Lord, how does He say that one must part for the Lord's sake? Because the word "as" does not everywhere denote perfect equality. Or: "submit," knowing that you are serving God — that is, even if not for the husband's own sake, then at least for the Lord's sake. For if the one who resists the higher authority resists the ordinance of the Lord, then all the more so the wife who resists her husband. And conversely, the wife who submits to her husband submits to the Lord.
Eph. 5:23. because the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the Church, and He Himself is the Savior of the body.
He presents the reason that wives must obey, and places the reason and cause of love in the fact that the husband occupies the position of ruler and guardian (for he is the head, in his words, and savior), while the wife occupies the position of the subordinate (for she is the body). Just as Christ, being the Head of the Church, cares for her and protects her, so too the husband is the guardian of his own body, that is, his wife. How then should the body not submit to the head, which cares for and protects it?
Eph. 5:24. But as the Church submits to Christ, so also wives to their own husbands in everything.
From this you will understand more clearly what he said above: "submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord." Since wives must submit to their husbands as the Church to Christ, and the Church and wives constitute this, then as to Christ, the wife must submit to her husband. But in what manner? Does he always command submission? Even when the husband is inclined toward unbelief? But Paul is not speaking now about unbelieving husbands, but about believing ones, about whom he was undoubtedly writing.
Eph. 5:25. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the Church and gave Himself up for her,
You have seen how Paul compels the wife to submit to you in the same measure as the Church submits to Christ; now hear how, on the other hand, he compels you to love her and not to treat her despotically. Love her, then! To what measure? As Christ loved the Church. Care for her as Christ cares for the Church. If it were necessary to suffer and even to die for her, do not refuse. For you, being already united with her by love, would do this; but He did this when she was in enmity against Him and was an adulteress. And just as He brought back to Himself the one who had turned away from Him not by threats and violence, so you yourself, if you should notice that your wife is withdrawing from you and seeking dissipation, try to draw her to yourself with greater love and care. And if you should suffer something for her sake, do not reproach her; for Christ does not reproach the Church either.
Eph. 5:26. that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water through the word;
So, she was depraved, impure, and without form, but He was not disgusted by her, and so you too should not be disgusted by your wife, even if she were ugly and worthless. And that the Church was ugly, listen: "you were once darkness," and what is blacker than darkness? They served malice and envy, and what can be more impure? Disobedient, foolish, and even blasphemous, and what can be more vile than this? And yet, He gave Himself up for her, as if she were beautiful and wonderful. And He cleansed her "with the washing of water," that is, baptism. "By means of the word." Which word? In the name of the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Spirit.
Eph. 5:27. that He might present it to Himself a glorious Church.
Not simply pure, but "glorious"! And just as Christ is the source of all blessings for the Church, so you too be the same for your wife; and just as He imparted spiritual beauty to the Church, so you too strive for this, and not for bodily beauty. And if you seek spiritual beauty in your wife, you will soon create it in her, setting her in order and making her glorious in spirit both for yourself and for God.
Eph. 5:27. not having spot, or blemish, or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish.
These words refer to the passions of the soul. Defilements are recent passions that are easy to wash away, which also caused dishonor; vices, however, are passions that have grown old over time — these are what made people unclean and are difficult to wash away. But the divine bath cleansed all of this and made them holy and blameless.
Eph. 5:28. So ought husbands to love their wives as their own bodies:
Not as a more important and most necessary example does he now point to this (for it is clear that the relationship of Christ to the Church is far more important than this example), but as one that is nearer and more at hand. Precisely so that no one might say that He was God and gave Himself up — he shows us this necessity in another way. "Ought," he says, to love, that is, this matter is not a favor but a debt and a necessity, because a wife is your body. Thus, the example of Christ he brought not only to show that one ought to love, but also to show that one ought to care for her well-being. "That she might be," he says, "holy and blameless." But the example of the body he put forward only in relation to love.
Eph. 5:28. loving his wife loves himself.
Eph. 5:29. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the Church,
He says that everyone applies intense and most diligent care for their own body, and so should you toward your wife. And again he brings Christ as an example, showing that Christ also loved us as His own flesh.
Eph. 5:30. because we are members of His body,
That is, we have a great kinship with Him.
Eph. 5:30. From His flesh and from His bones.
For He came from our substance, just as Eve from Adam. And as there the closeness was so great, so it is with us as well. And from another perspective too, we are "of His flesh and of His bones," because just as He was born of the Spirit without conjugal union, so are we in the baptismal font; and because having received the mysteries, we are from that moment divinely re-created. In short, he says that we have the highest closeness to Him. For both visibly He is a partaker with us in flesh and blood, and invisibly He is the source of our spiritual rebirth, just as Adam was the source of Eve's creation.
Eph. 5:31. For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.